This book was about my search for answers about my origins and where I also looked more at various events that have affected my family, including the genetic possibility that exists today to seek information.

It was a journey in history that taught me a lot of new things. Questions that were asked in the past are also asked today and much is repeated. We say that we will learn from history, but do we really do that? At the same time, we should not dwell on anything that is wrong, but look to the future.

What started as a pure genealogy trip became more and more a historical reflection with a lot of thoughts that I was not prepared for to appear. There were also descriptions of life and death.

I was born in 1951 in Sweden to Estonian parents. My mother and her family arrived in 1944 via a home-made boat from Estonian Nuckö. They were Estonian Swedes.

My father came to Sweden in 1947 via Kiel as a stowaway after he had fought for Estonia against the Bolsheviks in a German uniform.

It was not until 1958 that me, my sister and father became Swedish citizens. My mother and her family became Swedish citizens in 1947.